so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
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i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
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He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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