It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
