I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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