i permit you to call me
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize