then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
