wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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