is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize