Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
