Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
