id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
