What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
