Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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