We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
