my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
