Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.