Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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