i may or may not be watching the land before time
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
