Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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