week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize