I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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