Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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