At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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