I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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