mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
