So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize