Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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