I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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