We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
