just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
