You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Randomize
