like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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