And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
