please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
The air taste purple.
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