hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
