oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize