And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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