He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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