did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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