So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
