look no pants
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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