Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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