Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Damn victory sex feels great
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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