If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
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Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
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As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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