then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
