WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
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She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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