Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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