I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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