I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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