I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
