Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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