I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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