he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
