my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Just puked most of my soul out..
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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