this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
